Refined by years of suffering, one Oxford resident is translating his grief into selfless community service. 

Phil DuBois, a former nursing home administrator, and his adoptive son, Jamie, were among the surviving victims of an ecstasy-induced driving accident in 2007 that irrevocably shattered his life.  His wife, Tammy, died on impact; Jamie was left in critical condition; his uncle and cousin both passed away; and DuBois himself sustained severe injuries. 

“This is not real,” he remembers thinking in the ER room. “This happens to other people, but it can’t be happening to me.” 

Yet in spite of the magnitude of his losses, DuBois refused to let his circumstances dictate his attitude: “I realized that I can’t control what happens, but I can control how I respond to what happens.” 

Instead of giving into despair, DuBois embraced a new life of giving hope to others.  Defying his own victim-hood, DuBois now maintains the exhibitions that serve as ubiquitous symbols of new life: the Heart Galleries.  

Staged in Pizza Huts across the state, the Heart Galleries are prominent displays of foster care children who are up for adoption.  Couples or individuals who are seeking to adopt can, and often do, begin the adoption process in response to the exhibitions. 

In the past, the galleries were maintained by a non-profit agency, but funding woes within the DHHS crimped funding for the contract at the end of June.  When DuBois heard the news, he assumed the responsibility himself.   

“I’ve always had a passion for children in foster and adoptive care,” DuBois said, “but I don’t think people always recognize that there are orphans next door.  There are a lot of kids here in need.”  

Virginia Marriner, Director of Child Welfare Policy and Practice at DHHS, said the she’s excited to see a unique partnership between DHHS and the public evolving: “It really demonstrates that the community is willing to help us accomplish our work.  We’re really pleased that DuBois is utilizing his own experiences to make this a meaningful opportunity.” 

Tim Swift, the Adoption Program Manager, concurred: “It’s critical for the public to be able to view the children.”  He said the galleries act as a catalyst in the adoption process: “I can’t tell you how many people have adopted kids because of pictures they saw in the Heart Galleries.” 

Historically, Maine has facilitated more adoptions than most other states.  The latest available data indicates that Maine has tripled the number of adoptions from 85 in 1999 to over 300 today.  In comparison, the national average doubled over the same time period. 

In recent years, the total number of adoptions has gyrated around 320.  Swift said that DHHS is on track to hit the same mark this year: “To date, through June, we’ve facilitated 203 adoptions, and there are 105 pending.”

The number of children waiting to be adopted in Maine has been falling.  In 1999, there were 1095 kids on waiting lists.  Today, that number is at 470.  Click here to view the Administration for Children and Family’s 2008 report. 

Marriner said that the galleries have been instrumental to such success: “From the perspective of DHHS, the Heart Galleries are very important.  It has been extremely effective.  We have increased our adoptions from an average of 8 percent of general population of children in foster care up to 18 percent in 2009.”

For his part, DuBois said he derives motivation for his ministry from his own experience.  When DuBois saw Jamie for the first time after the accident, the first question his son asked him was: “Are you going to send me back to the state?”  DuBois immediately responded: “No.  That’s out of the question.  You are my son.  That’s not debatable.”

Incidents such as this one propelled him into full-time ministry in foster and adoptive care.  In a way, DuBois says he feels obligated: “These kids tug at my heart.  I can’t even conceive what it would have been like to grow up without a family that loved me.” 

As a single father raising an adoptive son, DuBois is not alone.  Of the 320 children adopted last year in Maine, 47 of them were adopted by single parents.  In addition, 241 were adopted by heterosexual couples; 15 by homosexual couples; and 17 by unmarried couples. 

For more information, visit DuBois’ website at www.secondbestministries.org.